douglas.nerad

Karoshi… Do Not Want

douglas — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 03:57:48 +0000

Work has been crackers. I mean, it gets busy sometimes but lately it’s been nothing but frantic and I can feel it. Partly it’s the season, partly it’s my own fault, but mostly I attribute much to Murphy.

Which is why when I saw this article about Japanese salary men working so much they keel over dead I thought, Do not want. It happens often enough that they even have a word for it: Karoshi.

Absolutely. Positively. Do. Not. Want.

Wordpress for iPhone

douglas — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 05:25:25 +0000

I heard about the release of WordPress for iPhone so I upgraded my blog ( and OOKEE.com) with the latest version of WordPress, set up the app on my phone and started writing this post. Very nice! It looks like I’ll be able to post pics from here, too. I’ll try that on another date.

It’s slow typing on here but it’s great that I’m no longer tethered to a computer. Yay WordPress!

How Do They Do That?

douglas — Sun, 20 Jul 2008 18:59:38 +0000

With shows like How It’s Made gaining popularity on the brainier channels, I think it’s the perfect time to make fun of the genre. I think we need a show called How Do They Do That? It sounds like it would feature magicians or card sharks or corrupt politicians or something. Instead it will feature those guys that drive unpopular tour buses and drone the same spiel day in and day out. How do that do that? Or the tattooed guys who wants to be an actor so he valets cars at restaurants in the swanky part of town quoting Shakespeare to customers hoping -beyond hope- that he’ll get noticed. How do they do that? Or the politician caught in the act, yet goes into full denial even holding a press conference. How do they do that?

Any ideas of your own?

(Ironically right after writing this I turned on the television and How Do They Do It came on; I might have to think of a new name for my show.)

Hellboy: The Golden Army

douglas — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 07:15:42 +0000

I went and saw Hellboy tonight with friends. I loved the first one and this one is just as good, though definitely different. More humor, more character, and a villain I could identify with. Lesson learned: never invite Red to karaoke…

Tonight We Vacuum in Hell!

douglas — Tue, 08 Jul 2008 05:32:33 +0000

Three weeks ago I meant to vacuum my space in the house. I hadn’t in about a month and the cat hair was getting… thick. But then I spent three weeks on the east coast and the cats had free reign. It is amazing how much they shed in just those three weeks. Normally I never let my cat on the bed (there are historical reasons for this). I got in and went to move the strange pillow at the bottom corner of my bed and realized it was a pile of cat hair. Urgh. The accumulated detritus of cat hair.

Tonight I vacuumed. It took me an hour. I think I might go over it all again tomorrow, just to be sure. And buy a brush for the damn cat. He likes that sort of thing anyways…

Laptop AWOL!

douglas — Mon, 07 Jul 2008 18:26:59 +0000

I’m back in San Francisco. Arrived late last night. Left backpack with laptop in taxi. Called taxi service. Taxi driver not answering CB or cell phone. Frack. This morning is the same story. On top of everything else, if I don’t get my laptop back I think I will turn from being rather sad to rather angry. Since I have the taxi driver’s car number the taxi driver will be found, too.

Frack!

UPDATE
The driver finally turned on his CB or answered his phone and… turned in my bag! Awesome! Thanks to Frank at dispatch and Mark at their HQ for all their help. I’m so relieved. Guess what I’ll be backing up when I get home. ;)

My Eulogy for Mom

douglas — Sun, 06 Jul 2008 17:45:26 +0000

One day when I was four or five I was near hysterics, running around the house and crying inconsolably. Finally my Mom caught me, pulled me on the couch and held me in one of her precious hugs. “What is it?” she asked, to which I balled even more. Somehow at such a young age I learned that everyone dies. “I don’t want you to die!” You consoled me and even laughed. “Everyone dies and that’s a part of life.” Somehow this made sense.

But on a Wednesday morning in June you died. I still understand the lesson you taught me: death is a part of life. Knowing this doesn’t make it easier.

The other day I asked my Mom’s very good friend how she was doing. I was concerned for her because all the focus the past couple weeks has been on us, the family. “I miss my friend,” she said. So simple. So powerful. I didn’t know what to say. How do you respond to that kind of loss?

Mom was all about family. Despite the distances she kept us connected. She was the family hub. If I have one single regret at her passing it is that I never married and had our Mother/Son dance. She will never get to meet the children I have but they will know about her, and she will live on in them.

I can’t tell you how many times I heard her say, “Life’s just tough all over.” Despite that she would be the first to support anyone if they had a plan to get through their difficulties. She was also the first to encourage me to move on. Once when a girlfriend and I had broken up she replied, “I’m very sorry to hear that, Dear. When are you going to start dating again?”

Mom would have been the first to encourage us to carry on and live meaningful lives. This doesn’t diminish the love she had for us, or our love for her. Yet life moves on. I am not a religious person so I am not banking on seeing Mom in some afterlife. But she does live on in my blood, in our memories and how we conduct our lives. She lives on in her family, her friends, the kids she’s taught, and all the lives she’s touched throughout her life.

I don’t have a lot of quick, insightful stories about my Mom. She was a consistent constant throughout my life. Loving, caring, stern, teasing, wise, giving. These aren’t qualities that lend themselves to vignettes. Her life needs a novel -a series of novels- to reveal the depth and breadth of her contributions and qualities.

Mom loved us, each of us, unconditionally and unforgivingly. I miss that love. I miss my Mom.

Physical Goodbyes

douglas — Mon, 23 Jun 2008 19:10:42 +0000

Yesterday we went to see my Mom before the cremation. I was really worried about seeing her. My Dad already warned me that she wouldn’t look anything like what I remembered of her. I worried that seeing her body would skew my memory of her, that my connection with her would be corrupted by seeing what had become of her. Weirdly it had the opposite effect. I had a wave of memories that I’m still processing in my mind, all of them coming together to form a memory and a fondness that I’d forgotten. In saying goodbye to her body I found something new that I won’t call happiness -I’ll never be happy about her death- but something that made me smile. I love her, I’ll miss her, and she’d be the first person to tell me we’ll be alright. And we will be.

My Mom’s Memorial Service Date

douglas — Sun, 22 Jun 2008 03:48:34 +0000

My Mom’s memorial services will be on July 2nd at the Accotink Unitarian Universalist Church in Burke, VA at 1PM. My Mom was hoping people would contribute to the American Cancer Society to help fight the disease that took her life. She also wanted flowers to be sent to those who could still use their symbol of hope, comfort and support at the Walter Reed Medical Center and the Bethesda Navy Medical Center. Please make donations in my Mom’s name, Susan Ann Nerad.

On a very personal note, I want to thank you for all your support. My family and I truly appreciate it. Sometimes it’s very hard and sometimes it’s alright. When I finally get back to San Francisco I’m planning on going out somewhere and having a toast for my Mom and for Moms everywhere. I’d be honored if anyone able to come would join me.

Susan Ann Nerad

douglas — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 15:02:16 +0000

This morning my Mom passed away from her cancer and cancer related illness. I’m in shock. It will hit me soon. All of you, call your Moms and tell her you love her.