Archive for 'family' Category
2008.06.23
Physical Goodbyes
Yesterday we went to see my Mom before the cremation. I was really worried about seeing her. My Dad already warned me that she wouldn’t look anything like what I remembered of her. I worried that seeing her body would skew my memory of her, that my connection with her would be corrupted by seeing what had become of her. Weirdly it had the opposite effect. I had a wave of memories that I’m still processing in my mind, all of them coming together to form a memory and a fondness that I’d forgotten. In saying goodbye to her body I found something new that I won’t call happiness -I’ll never be happy about her death- but something that made me smile. I love her, I’ll miss her, and she’d be the first person to tell me we’ll be alright. And we will be.
No Comments | Catergorized: family2008.06.21
My Mom’s Memorial Service Date
My Mom’s memorial services will be on July 2nd at the Accotink Unitarian Universalist Church in Burke, VA at 1PM. My Mom was hoping people would contribute to the American Cancer Society to help fight the disease that took her life. She also wanted flowers to be sent to those who could still use their symbol of hope, comfort and support at the Walter Reed Medical Center and the Bethesda Navy Medical Center. Please make donations in my Mom’s name, Susan Ann Nerad.
On a very personal note, I want to thank you for all your support. My family and I truly appreciate it. Sometimes it’s very hard and sometimes it’s alright. When I finally get back to San Francisco I’m planning on going out somewhere and having a toast for my Mom and for Moms everywhere. I’d be honored if anyone able to come would join me.
No Comments | Catergorized: family2008.06.18
Susan Ann Nerad
This morning my Mom passed away from her cancer and cancer related illness. I’m in shock. It will hit me soon. All of you, call your Moms and tell her you love her.
2008.05.11
Mega Drive
I’m on the East Coast right now. There are two reasons. The main reason is because my Mom will be having surgery and I want to be here for her. The second is to move my Gramma, who my parents have been taking care of, up to Boston area to live with my Aunt. Yesterday morning about 10AM I left my front door. It took 13 hours. At approximately 440 miles, that averages out to just under 34MPH…!
OK, so who the hell in Delaware thought it would be a brilliant idea to close three lanes of traffic on 95? This was the first time in my life I experienced a traffic jam that spanned an entire state. It’s a good thing 95 crosses only a small part of Delaware. This brilliant idea by the road planning commission cost me 1.5 - 2 hours. Further, I knew NYC would be bad but it was worse than even I expected. What’s up with all the lanes on supposed “interstate highways” being too narrow to even fit a car? Hello Brooklyn! I’m talking to you!
Overall, though, the trip was alright. Long, boring (rental trucks need tape or CD drives) but bearable. I’m pretty proud that I managed to pull it off.
PS: Happy Mother’s Day all you Moms out there!
2 Comments | Catergorized: family life2008.05.08
Special Lazy Time
It’s been special lazy time for my and the blog for the past week. I would apologize, but I’m just not sorry. :)
Work has been busy. Since becoming a manager I’ve gotten to do things I’ve never done before… like spend $200,000 on equipment that will depreciate in value faster than a cheap American car.
The big distraction, however, has been my Mom’s cancer situation that I alluded to here. Although the most recent prognosis is better than the original, I still don’t know enough to feel comfortable about the whole thing. I’m not stressed or anxious yet. I suppose that will happen when I fly out tomorrow and get a chance to talk to my family in person.
Meanwhile I’ve found and not posted tons of things I thought would be interesting, like President Bush trying to blame Democrats for the housing crisis and rising cost of gasoline, a site with tons of pithy rules of thumb and, of course, the uno. At least 10 people have sent me that link now… I will post a few more, including a relative large “Who Is the Final Cylon” entry, sometime soon!
No Comments | Catergorized: family life work2008.04.26
Exhausted Whinging
Lately I’ve been super stressed with work. There is far too much going on and it’s affecting my sleep. This isn’t too unusual and once the projects are over I’ll get back to my normally scheduled patterns. A monkey wrench was thrown into all of this with the bad news that my Mom has some form of cancer. She just found out so the test results aren’t back. Until then we don’t know much more than what I just told you.
Normally I try not to let unknowns affect me too terribly much. After all getting stressed about the unknown causes anxiety that no one needs or wants. I wasn’t always one to push aside worries about things I had no control over or that were simply made up possibilities. At some point in my life I discovered I felt a lot better and relaxed if I just dealt with the facts instead of speculation. No matter the perspective, though, my Mom’s situation is bothering me.
When I was four or five we lived in the Boston area. One day I was near hysterics, running around the house and crying inconsolably. Finally my Mom caught me, pulled me on the couch and held me in one of her precious hugs. “What is it?” she asked, to which I balled even more. Somehow at such a young age I learned that everyone dies. “I don’t want you to die!”
Mom, even if we lived forever, that sentiment is still true.
7 Comments | Catergorized: family life work2008.03.20
Gran Torino
I don’t care what this movie is about… When it comes out I’m going to see it. Clint Eastwood is going to direct and star in a movie called Gran Torino.
We had a 1976 Ford Gran Torino when I was a kid. Four doors, silver, and built like a tank. When I could finally drive in high school that was the car my parents let me use. My friends dubbed it The Beast and the name stuck. We had all kinds of adventures in The Beast, from Jolt dropping to road trips to simply driving to and from school, which was never a direct route… There were always detours and visits along the way. I had The Beast in college, too, and put thousands upon thousands of miles on him. I wonder if my parents had any idea at the time just how far I’d gone.
The Beast was indestructible. We had it in Korea when we lived there the first time. A bus tried to cut into our lane and hit us instead. The bus was a wreck but The Beast had a little ding and paint scratches. The Beast would fix himself, too. Once he had a hole in his radiator and I’d have to fill it up after every trip. Then one day me and some friends were on a road trip to some obscure Ohio town and I was told to make a left turn LONG after it was safe to make a left turn. I slid in the gravel in the median and right into the pole holding up the “No U Turn” sign and flattened it. Afterwards the radiator never leaked again.
I loved The Beast but after college I was off to Prague. I left him in my parent’s care and, while I was on another continent and couldn’t do much about it, they donated The Beast to an auto repair school. Probably a fitting end though I think an escape like any of the chase scenes from Blues Brothers. My sister always complained that I destroyed him and he wouldn’t run (I think she wanted it once she was old enough) but I know he was running perfectly well -or at least well enough- when I left.
I miss that car. Every once in a while I see a Gran Torino on the road and get wistful and nostalgic. I’ve always liked the movie The Highlander and there is one scene, after the fight in the garage at Madison Square Garden and MacLeod is getting the guy’s power, where you can see the front of a Gran Torino in the background. Yes, the car affected me so much that I notice them in movies, even.
No word on what the movie is about, but it had best feature some shots of one of The Beast’s cousins or I’m gonna be pissed!
5 Comments | Catergorized: college family friends korea life memories movies2008.03.12
Spoiled Kids
There’s something very weird about living in an affluent society… Kids are too often raised to expect they will get whatever they want. This gives them a sense of entitlement and the kids take things for granted. Frankly, most kids I know (and this is just my perspective) seem spoiled and selfish.
Which is why seeing this video was so heartening. This boy is utterly the opposite of everything I described above. “You mean it’s mine? To keep? Forever?” And when he tries to give his parents some money I, a grown man, had a tear in my eye. Absolutely awesome.
3 Comments | Catergorized: family life2007.09.23
4×4 Ayes
So Jason tagged me with one of these things where you answer all kinds of questions and then tag others in the hope that they reveal as much information as you do so your answers aren’t quite so embarrassing when you look at them the day after you post them. Jason’s post is a series of four answers for various personal stats. My post title pays homage to the nature of fours, his post title, the fact that I didn’t post anything for Talk Like a Pirate Day, and an old anime called 3×3 Eyes. I’m kind of proud of how much reference is in that title. :)
Four jobs I have had (current job excluded):
I’ll make these approximately in order from the first jobs that I consider “real jobs” since I’ve had far too many jobs in my life…
- Burger Flipper. McDonalds. My parents made a deal with me in high school that I could drive the car but I had to pay for the gas and maintenance. Not knowing what else to do I took a job in fast food just like, it seems, much of America has at that age.
- Industrial Drill Press Operator. Haynes Engineering and Manufacturing. For two summers I worked for my Uncle in Detroit as a drill press operator. We made many of the pumps that Detroit automakers used on their assembly lines. It was hard, dirty work but I learned a lot about honest work under the watchful eyes of my Uncle and the guys in the shop.
- No title. The Front Room. I don’t know if all of you are old enough to remember, but coffee shops used to be almost non-existent. There were no vente, grande, or short coffees. Certainly no frappucino sweet drinks. Despite that we were on the bleeding edge and actually had imported coffee. Ironically I didn’t drink coffee at the time.
- Currency Exchanger. Cekobanka. My only qualifications for this job were I could count in a couple languages and speak English natively. The job rather sucked but the people I worked with were united in their bitterness in the job and scorn for the tourists.
Four Films I have Watched Again and Again:
I’m going to divide this up into chunks of time since, really, I watch too many movies. This is probably the only part of this post where I could go on and on and on without let up, and even the answers I give will seem extremely limited. I won’t be happy with any of the answers alone…
- High School. Highlander. I couldn’t even tell you how many times we watched this. For quite a long time it was almost a weekly ritual. There can be only one!
- College. The Princess Bride and Heathers. Two of the most quotable movies in my life for a really long time. Eskimo! Another good one from this time was Dangerous Liasons.
- Early San Francisco. The Matrix and Starship Troopers. Although The Matrix has sort of dropped off the radar after its sequels came out and I got disillusioned with it, Starship Troopers will still come out when Mookee and I are drinking. Man, we drank a lot of Weinhards beer watching these…
- Late San Francisco. The Fifth Element and About a Boy. I have quite a large collection of DVDs at this point, and for some reason whenever I feel stuck on what I want to watch I keep coming to these two. There are tons of other movies I’ll watch again and again, but these two keep drawing me back.
Four Places I Have Lived:
I’ve grown up moving a lot. Comes from my Dad being in the military. Until I came to San Francisco, in fact, I hadn’t stayed anywhere more than a couple years. So here are a few of my favorites.
- Seoul, Korea. We lived here the first time in my preteen years. It was a brilliant time when our family pulled together. I consider my years extremely formative and can see so much of who I am today coming from those three years.
- Athens, Ohio. This is where I went to college. First relationships, life long friends, and loads of stories as we all started discovering our first tastes of independence.
- Prague, Czech Republic. Finally out of college I went to Prague. There’s so much that happened there I don’t even know what to say. So I won’t.
- San Francisco, California. I had a hard time picking between here and Washington, DC, but I have to choose SF. I’ve been here 10 years this month which is more than twice as long as anywhere I’ve ever lived before. For those who know me that speaks volumes.
Four Shows I Love to Watch:
This is the hardest one for me to answer because I don’t watch television. Seriously. So many of these will be “expired” shows. I think each of my shows depended hugely on their ensemble cast. There is no mistake that they are all science fiction, too. Honorable mention to Stargate.
- Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. I loved this show. I think this is one of the very first American shows that had an angry black male in the lead role. It also had an angry Klingon, but that’s another story.
- Space: Above and Beyond. This, along with the next entry, are two shows that were given only (merely?) a single season yet I thought were amazing. S:AaB took war into space with all its ugliness, heroism, humanism, and reality. I wish they’d been given a chance to at least end the series properly.
- Firefly. What a show. While it started kind of awkwardly it sucked me in and didn’t let go. The idiots at Fox television made such a huge mistake in cancelling this and S:AaB above.
- Battlestar Galactica, old and new. I love these. I remember being allowed to stay up and watch the original series with my parents. I think it was the first show we ever watched as a family. And the new series… Well, if you’ve been reading this blog at all you know what a huge fan I am.
Four Places I Have Been on Vacation:
I haven’t had a lot of real vacations in my life. I’m not much of a vacation kind of guy. Aside from yearly trips up to Tahoe to snowboard, here are a few of my more memorable trips.
- Okinawa, Japan. My Dad, brother and I went to Okinawa when we were stationed in Korea the first time. My brother and I were so bloody excited to eat at a McDonalds again, much to Dad’s chagrin, but really, the whole trip was amazing. The place was so shockingly green in color…
- Chejudo, Korea. We went one summer break from college when I was back in Korea. The island is well and truly one of the most beautiful places on Earth and almost completely unknown outside of Korea and Japan.
- Oahu, Hawaii. Annemone and I visited my brother and his family when they were stationed at Pearl Harbor and went around the island. I loved visiting but I don’t think I could ever live there; too insular (which is quite an appropriate word if you know Latin).
- Paris, France and Prague, Czech Republic. Though part of my trip earlier this summer was for work, I did take some time off and fell in love with Europe all over again.
Four of my Favorite Foods:
I’m not really a
- Kraft Macaroni and Cheese. For years as a kid this is what I had on my birthday every year. I will still eat a whole box of it every other week or so…
- Steak. Almost any kind of steak. Mmmm… meat.
- Chocolate covered cherries. These things are like crack to me. I’m eating some now.
- Lasagna. I don’t know what it is about lasagna. Amazing. Safeway makes an amazing vegetarian lasagna. I’m not a vegetarian by any stretch but this stuff is addictive. I’ve even gotten friends hooked on it.
Four of my Favorite Drinks:
- Jolt Cola. I wish this stuff were more widely available out here. I’d drink it to the exclusion of almost anything else.
- Coffee. Love it. Live it.
- Fermented and unfermented red grape. I love red wine, almost any kind of varietal. Also in the last year I’ve been drinking gallon on gallon of grape juice. It’s actually helped me cut the amount of Coke I drink dramatically.
- Coca Cola. I do still drink Coke, though. I used to drink tons of it (since Jolt is hard to find) but in the past few years I just have some with lunch. Sadly (?) I don’t even always finish the bottle I start anymore.
Four Places I Would Rather Be Right Now:
- Paris.
- Prague.
- New Zealand.
- Asleep.
Four Bloggers I’m Tagging:
Let’s see if I can break the bad luck I have getting others to take this up…
CarlosCosta at Population Statistic. Let’s see how adorkable his lists are. :)- Kevin at Humble Tidbits of Vacuity. I can’t wait to hear more about his vacations.
- Mr. Brown at Brown That Banana. Really I just want to see what pictures he uses.
- Banana Boy over at Banana Land. Nothing to do with Mr. Brown’s blog. I keep hoping he’ll do one of these.
2007.07.25
Dugh the Drink
One of my nicknames is Dugh Daren. “Dugh” comes from an old college story, and “Daren” is just my family name backwards.
My Dad, being the funny guy he is, was doing Google searches and ran across this for Dugh:
Westerners, always looking for the next big thing in beverages, could probably take a lesson from the Middle East. With summer temperatures from Tehran to Cairo reaching well into the triple digits, the art of the cooling drink is a source of pride — and self-preservation — in many Middle Eastern homes.This refreshing yogurt drink is a summer staple in Iran. Try it garnished with a bit of fresh mint.
Probably not something I would enjoy, but an unexpected definition of a nickname I often use.
No Comments | Catergorized: family food-drink life
