2008.06.23
Physical Goodbyes
Yesterday we went to see my Mom before the cremation. I was really worried about seeing her. My Dad already warned me that she wouldn’t look anything like what I remembered of her. I worried that seeing her body would skew my memory of her, that my connection with her would be corrupted by seeing what had become of her. Weirdly it had the opposite effect. I had a wave of memories that I’m still processing in my mind, all of them coming together to form a memory and a fondness that I’d forgotten. In saying goodbye to her body I found something new that I won’t call happiness -I’ll never be happy about her death- but something that made me smile. I love her, I’ll miss her, and she’d be the first person to tell me we’ll be alright. And we will be.
Categorized: family
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