Archive for October, 2004

2004.10.19

Unmotivational Speaker

The man stood up in front of the audience. “Okay you lot. Sit up. Life can get you down and you know what, that sucks. Yes, I’m here to tell you that tough luck is what you’ve faced, what you’re facing, and what you will face for the rest of your lives. Sorry to tell you this, but you’re never going to get what you really really want. Ever.”

Someone piped up in the back. “Excuse me, but that can’t be true because some people seem to have everything.”

“This is true. There are some truly stupid, worthless people out there who somehow manage to get whatever they want whenever they want it. I can name a few politicians, a few rich guys, one or two people in entertainment. Fuck all if anyone knows how they managed it. I don’t know, and I wouldn’t be here talking to you if I did. I don’t have it, and you certainly don’t have it or you wouldn’t be here.”

“But you’re a motivational speaker. You’re supposed to tell us we can accomplish anything we want or reach any goal we set our minds to.”

“Now why would I want to go around telling you lies like that? I’m not a liar. I might be a failure, a scammer, a freeloader, but never a liar. I’m telling you like it is. If I said you could reach any goal, knowing full well you wouldn’t, I wouldn’t be doing my job properly.”

A murmur ran through the crowd then. “What the fuck are you doing here then?”

“Well, I’m here to tell you to at least try to reach those goals. Try for them even if you never make them. And you won’t make them, but at least if you try you might get somewhere. Anywhere. It might not be where you expect it to be, but it’ll be better than sitting on your ass feeling sorry for yourself that you aren’t rich, or famous, or have a private harem.”

“You want us to try, even though we’ll fail.”

“Yup. Just try. If you don’t, you’re an even sorrier loser than you look.”

2004.10.18

Urban Wildlife

Last night I was witness to the “circle of life” right in Ann’s backyard. I was home alone while she was visiting family friends and heard noises outside. Looking out I saw a raccoon in the grass. Animals had dug up Ann’s yard on several occasions and so I stomped on the patio to try and scare it away.

Urban raccoons, however, aren’t afraid of people, and it just kept gnawing away on… whatever it was. My stomping, however, sent three more of his friends out in the yard, eight glowing eyes staring up at me. I thought better of it and went back in the house to look at them with glass between us.

They could have cared less about me, though. They fought over the food which, it appeared, still had a bit of fight left. I saw it had two glowing eyes, too. I thought it might be a rat. Somehow I didn’t feel too sorry for the rat. How can you feel sorry for a rat? Instead I looked around the house for Ann’s camera. I couldn’t find it and a quick call confirmed Ann had taken it with her. Needless to say she wasn’t happy to hear that the raccoons were having a party in her backyard.

I wasn’t about to be more manly than I am so I hopped on my computer instead and worked on last night’s entry. Every once in a while I’d check on their progress. An hour later and they had gone so I grabbed a flashlight and headed out to investigate the damage. A few holes in the grass and some small bits of fur were all that remained.

I jumped at a noise behind me. Fortunately it was just a possum wandering about. I watched him move slowly under some boards. Ann came home and told me that possums go in twos, so likely the raccoon’s dinner was his friend. This made me sad.

This morning all I could find in the yard was an ear. RIP, poor possum. I think it’s time to bring my slingshot over to Ann’s so I can drive those raccoons off the next time I see them. Stupid raccoons.

2004.10.17

3dOS

What would be the properties of a three dimensional operating system? Following my speculations here I’ve given this some thought. Unfortunately I am not a programmer, nor so I have a degree in computer science. Therefore my ideas may be way off center or impractical. Also, I fear they are too much based upon the current two dimensional model.

Obviously a three dimensional operating system (3dOS) would be based on Software and Hardware, and how the User interacts with both. I believe that, generally, the software we currently have is up to the task at hand to create a rudimentary 3dOS. Gamers have already shown that 3D environments are usable and practicle.

I think the interface with the 3dOS, the hardware specifically, need alot of work. Not that there isn’t technology out there already, but it’s adaption is sometimes too expensive, sometimes limited in scope, and sometimes just too silly for a person to take seriously.

Over the course of the next week or so I’ll be going over some of these ideas as they’ve been percolating in my head. These are the times where I wish I had the influence to pull the proper group of people together to make this idea a reality, because whoever comes up with a simple, useful 3dOS will be the next Apple and Microsoft rolled into one.

In the meantime enjoy this detailed explaination of 3DOSX, a MacOS X quasi-3d file browser which attempted (it’s unclear to me whether it is still being developed) to create a simple 3D interface.

2004.10.15

Last Pick

We’ve all known the kid who was picked last for every game on the playground when we were young. This aggravated me alot because, often, I was that last kid picked. It’s not that I wasn’t good at the games but because I was an outsider. I hadn’t grown up with the other kids because we moved every few years. It was a popularity contest and I wasn’t popular because no one even knew who I was.

This “last pick” irritation survives to this day. It’s true: someone always has to be last, just as someone always has to be first. However, no one is ever always last. Now I’m old enough to realize I don’t have to participate at all. Not that it matters because I’m also old enough to choose who I am hanging out with, and with my friends it doesn’t matter so much who’s first and last.

A guy I haven’t talked to in months walks up to me. “Hey, a few people can’t play volleyball today and no one else is available. Do you want to play?”

“You know what? No. If you only think of me as a last resort then it’s a waste of my time.”

2004.10.13

Cambodia Cruz

A very long time ago I came up with a character named Cambodia Cruz, a blatant rip off of Indiana Jones. I loved those movies and wanted to do something similar. Last week while talking with NHK I remembered I’d actually written a short story about him and dug it out of my paper archives.

Now I’m in the process of transcribing the material. Oh my dear lord, what a tradedy. I can’t believe how horrible it is! It’s so bad it’s almost funny to read passages of it now. There’s absolutely zero characterization, a flat linear plot line, a suddenly appearing female interest (halfway through the story, no less), and the action is entirely reaction.

After transcribing it I think I’ll go back and rewrite it and, if it seems at all interesting, I’ll post the results here. In fact maybe I’ll post them side by side so you all can see how bad the first one was and what you can do with a simple rewrite. Meanwhile I’ll leave you with this bad bad example…

Recovering from the initial shock, Cambodia Cruz stood up. He was in pit about ten feet deep with a two foot ledge halfway up. At first Cruz wondered why the hell the makers of the place would bother to make a trap that was easy to escape from. Then he heard a series of clicks going around the ceiling. Sudden apprehension seized him. As fast as his body would move he climbed out of the pit and into one of the surrounding passages.

Just as he slipped into the corridor the ceiling fell and covered up the pit with an ear popping explosion. Cambodia Cruz sat down in relief. The trap, he thought, was designed to trap the person down in the pit under five feet of stone. Five feet!

Five feet, indeed! What I didn’t include is he tripped and, “His nose hit the ground and triggered a hidden mechanism that made the entire floor of the room fall into a pit.” Urgh, it hurts just to share that, but it’s too sad not to throw your way. His nose must be mighty powerful to trigger the collapse of the floor… sigh

2004.10.12

Challenge Winners

My challenge call was answered and the resounding winners are Uncle Roger and Jason Clark. I can’t really claim to have won since on Saturday I postponed until late at night when I suddenly discovered my ISP went down and I couldn’t post! Yes, I’ve yet again learned the lesson of procrastination.

I think I’ll have this contest every year, and maybe more often. Quarterly? I should probably come up with a snappier title, too. Maybe the October Blogathon? Any ideas? For now, however, feel free to paste this code somewhere on your site:

Winner: October Blog Challenge

For the next one I’ll come up with a graphic…

Thanks to Mr. Defiant and Gracie for participating, too! I know your time was crunched or you would have made it. In the meantime, Jason has issued a continued challenge (5th item down) to post an article everyday for the rest of the month. I’m going for it…

2004.10.11

Characters & Viewpoint

Anyone interested in writing fiction would find great benefit from reading Mr. Cards clear advice on developing characters that stand out, and creating the correct viewpoint to write from. Unfortunately I read this over the span of months not having dedicated to reading lately. Still, I will always wonder what the true story of Pete and Nora, Mr. Card’s “demonstration” characters. If the point is to create memorable characters and viewpoints the book succeeds on those two characters alone!

Sections include: Inventing Characters, Constructing Characters, and Performing Characters, which many chapters dedicated to each section. Click on the image above to pick it up for yourself.

2004.10.11

Badly Drawn Boy

Today Ann and I went to see Badly Drawn Boy (AKA Damon Gough) at Rasputin Music in Berkeley. They are off in support of the new album One Plus One Is One. He performed with his flute player, wearing his trademark hat and being rather funny, mentioning he was suprised he was up and about so early (it was almost 3PM) since he still had a hangover.

The perfomance, though simple, was very interesting. I’ve been listening to the music for so long that to hear the complex arrangements played on an acoustic guitar was enlightening. I can’t wait to try out a few of the techniques myself. I’ll write up a better review of the album itself another time. In the meantime, click here to pick up the album yourself and give it a listen.

2004.10.10

SF Open Studios

I am not much of an art person. It’s not that I don’t like art, but that I think most of the stuff I’ve seen is a waste of effort.

Still, I’ve gone to a few shows with Ann and others. I learned today that every October in San Francisco is open studio season, and we met Kendra, Dale, Paul and Tracy and wandered through a few of the larger studio collectives. This is the second week of it, there are still many many opportunities to see stuff out there.

The biggest suprise to me wasn’t the art itself (though Bunnymatic was fun!), but some of the amazing studios we had the opportunity to see. The live/work spaces were especially impressive. I don’t know how much something like that costs, but it’s definately something I could do, and maybe it would get me a new direction in life… yup, I could definately use one of those.

PS: This was posted a day late because my ISP was down yesterday night…

2004.10.09

Computer Interface Stagnation

Computer Interface Stagnation
Two dimensional interfaces for computers (read: the Desktop, etc) are dinosaurs in the modern age. Where are the three dimensional computer interfaces? Let’s go to Hogwarts to find out. Read the rest of this entry…